


Robbe + Sander: the story continued

by MatthiasVisie



Category: WTFock | Skam (Belgium)
Genre: Bi, Bisexual, Bisexuality, Gay, Homo, Homosexual, Homosexuality, LGBT, Love, Pan - Freeform, Pansexual, SKAM, SKAM - Freeform, SKAM Season 3, biseksualiteit, biseksueel, gaylove, homoseksualiteit, homoseksueel, lhbt, panseksualiteit, panseksueel, pansexuality, skam belgium - Freeform, wtfock - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:02:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 12,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22113040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MatthiasVisie/pseuds/MatthiasVisie
Kudos: 32





	1. 21/12, 12:12

Robbe enters the kitchen, while Zoë is cooking with music playing loud. When she sees Robbe, she turns off the music.

'You aren't awake yet that the music is so loud?' Robbe asks her.

'No, it's just...'

'That you don't want to think about Senne,' Robbe guesses.

'Yes, breaking up with your boyfriend right before Christmas isn't the nicest thing to do. But as I told you, it was necessary. We will see what the future brings,' Zoë says. 'Where is your boyfriend?'

'He's taking a shower.'

'Aren't you supposed to be with him under the shower?' Zoë asks with a big smile.

Robbe smiles guiltily. 'We already spent the whole night together,' he winks.

'But still you're already awake?' Zoë asks it with very much intonation, to show that she's surprised. 'I would still be in my bed right now.'

'We're awake since 11. And we had to wake up on time anyway, we visit Sanders mother this afternoon.' Robbe is making a tea for himself in the meantime. He's looking for rose-hip tea.

'Ooh, that's so cute. Aren't you nervous?'

'A bit, yes,' Robbe admits. 'And when we will be there standing in front of the door I will feel the nerves everywhere in my body. I hope she likes me.'

Zoë looks at Robbe with a look that says 'Are you serious?' 'Everybody likes you, Robbe,' Zoë says. 'As long as you are yourself. And you are now.' The water in the shower has stopped running, Sander must be ready by now.

'I'm the first boy he will take home with him. I'm really curious.' Robbe is sitting on the kitchen counter again, where he always likes to sit when he's talking with someone. Just sitting on a chair? That's too boring for him. The table or the kitchen counter, that's nicer.

'What are you cooking for lunch?' Robbe asks.

Sander enters the kitchen before Zoë can answer Robbe's question. He's only wearing his underwear.

'There he is, the man of my life,' Robbe says.

Sander looks behind him playfully. 'Where? Who? I don't see any other boy.'

'You are of course,' Robbe says.

'Say that again please?' Sanders asks. 'I want to make sure that I didn't mishear it.'

'You are the man of my life,' Robbe says again. He's watching Sander intensely now. Sander walks towards Robbe and kisses him. Zoë can't stop smiling when she sees them being in love.

'Have you seen my new T-shirt? The one I got from Noor last night.'

'I don't know,' Robbe answers. 'Where have you left your clothes last night?'

'I can't find them,' Sander says.

'Come on, Sander. You promised you would keep your clothes on when we would visit your mother.' Robbe says it with a serious face but then starts laughing. 'Come, I'll help you finding them. But something else, before I forget...'

'Yes?' Sander asks. He almost looks worried.

'Don't look worried,' Robbe says while he's playing with the angel necklace that he gave Sander yesterday. The exact same one as Robbe has. 'What would your mother like to get as a gift?'

'A gift?' Sander asks surprised. 'You want to bring her a gift? That's not really necessary, Robbe. But it's cute.'

'No, no, I want to give her something. It's almost Christmas and it's the first time I'll meet her.'

'Why are you so good,' Sander says tenderly. 'I remember again why I fell in love with you. I almost forgot but I remember now.'

Sander and Robbe are looking straight into each other's eyes. 'You're such a tease,' Robbe says. 'I think that's why I fell in love with you. Besides your nice eyes, your nice hair, your divine body.'

'Oh come on boys,' Zoë says. 'Soon all that slobber in my food.'

Sander and Robbe both watch Zoë but don't say anything. They know she's joking.

'She would like a perfume,' Sander says when he's looking at Robbe again.

'Okay, we'll go buy a perfume then. I'll help you to find your clothes, we eat something and then we go to the shop. You know what smell she likes so you have to help me,' Robbe answers.

'Okay, okay.'

'At what time we have to be with her?' Robbe asks.

'I don't know.'

'Sander, are you serious? You have arranged it with her.'

'It doesn't really matter,' Sander says. 'She's at home all day. Between 4 and 5. I know she'll have pie and coffee prepared, that was also the case the first two times I brought somebody home. So between 4 and 5 is perfect.'

'Okay, let's move then,' Robbe is hurrying up. 'There is not that much time left and I don't want to be with her too late. I want her to have a good impression. I hope she likes me,' he says again.

'Robbe, everybody likes you,' Sander and Zoë say simultaneously. 'Don't be nervous.'


	2. 21/12, 17:41

'Did you like the pie?' Sanders mother asks.

'Yes, very much,' Robbe answers.

'Would you like to have another piece?'

'No, thank you, ma...'

'If you call me madam one more time I throw you out,' Sanders mother laughs. 'It's Kaat.'

'Okay.' Robbe smiles. 'I had enough, I already ate two pieces. If I would become fat I think Sander doesn't want me anymore.' While saying this he looks at Sander.

'Of course not,' Sander says without thinking. 'The Robbe I fell in love with, is slim.'  
Robbe watches Sander with a face that says 'I hope you don't mean that.'

'No, I don't mean that of course,' Sander answers. 'Even if you would weigh 20 kilos more I would still love you. But try to stay like you are,' he says with a smile.

'So you got to know each other at the beach?' Kaat asks. She looks like a very proud woman, very well dressed. Not exaggerated, just stylish. It's clear who Sander got his feeling for style from.

'Yes, I was there with some friends and schoolmates,' Robbe answers kindly.

'And I was there with Britt, you know,' Sanders replies.

'What were you actually doing there?' Robbe asks. 'You were there with Britt, but why weren't you with us in the house we rented?'

'Because Britt didn't plan to go along,' Sander answers. 'She didn't want to go, so I said "Okay, no problem." But when I heard you would be there too, I booked a chalet for her and me. You know what I told you when I first saw you?'

Robbe smiles, this question doesn't need an answer but he answers anyway. 'Yes.'

'I wanted to do everything to make you mine. Even if that meant I would have to spend a whole week at the beach with strangers.'

Robbe is so touched he doesn't know what to say. 'Really?'

'Yes, so behind Britts back I booked something. First she was mad at me, later she said she liked it that week. That's how she is. But anyway, in the meantime I got in touch with you. And if that wouldn't have happened I would have tried again here in Antwerp.'

'How?' Robbe asks curiously.

'I don't know, I would have thought of something. Picking Britt up at school to see you for example. Or going to a party where I knew that you would be.'

'You are unbelievable,' Robbe says.

Robbe kisses Sander, Kaat watches tenderly and says 'I'm so happy to see how happy you are together.'

A car is parking on the driveway. 'I think Sarah is there. Anyone who would like to have another drink?'


	3. 23/12, 10:12

'Good morning,' Zoë and Milan say to Sander when he enters the kitchen, the place where everything seems to happen.

'Good morning,' Sander replies. 'Have you seen Robbe? He's gone. He hasn't left a note or a message.'

'No,' Milan reacts surprised. 'But he will come back to you, always, I'm sure about that.' After saying that he watches Sander for a few seconds. It must be clear on Sanders face that he's worried. 5 minutes without Robbe and he already misses him. Even less. 2 minutes, 1 minute.

'How was it with your mother on Saturday? You haven't told us anything yet, neither Robbe,' Zoë says.

'It was very nice, very cosy. She totally accepts him. She likes him, she told me. I made a good choice,' Sander answers with a smile.

'You see, there was nothing to be nervous about,' Milan says while he's eating a slice of bread.

'It was in particular Robbe who was nervous,' Sander answers. 'He's so cute when he's nervous. He's cute when he's mad. He's cute when he smiles.' Sander stares dreamy at the ceiling.

Zoë and Milan both smile. 'Yeah, we get it.'

At that time Robbe comes home as well, with the bag of a baker in one of his hands.

'There you are,' Sander says. 'I started to be worried.'

'Sander, that's very kind, but you know I don't leave you. You were asleep so beautiful and I owed you something.' Robbe keeps the bag high and shows it proudly to Sander. 'Croissants! Last time it took us 1 hour to eat, so I thought "Let's return the favour and eat them really fresh and warm now."

'That's sweet,' Sander smiles.

'And my artist has to study well today so he needs energy.'

Sander is so touched he almost cries. He never thought someone could sincerely love him like that. 'That's too sweet. How many did you bring? 9 I see.'

'2 for you, 2 for me, 2 for Zoë and of course 3 for Milan.' Robbe smiles at Milan while he says it.

'Okay, let's leave the ones for Zoë and Milan here and eat ours in your room,' Sander says to Robbe.

'You don't eat with us?' Milan says.

'Sorry,' Sander replies. 'We have things to do, study for example.' Sander smiles.

'Oh come on,' Zoë answers. 'Is it always like that with gays?' She asks Milan.

Milan smiles. 'It's always like that with young people in love.'


	4. 23/12, 19:52

'Well, what are you doing here?' Robbe asks Sander when Sander enters the kitchen. 'Aren't you supposed to study?' Robbe looks up from the potatoes he's peeling for this evening.

'I studied all day today, it's after 7 pm now. I need a break, I've studied enough for today. How was it with Jens this afternoon?' Sander gives Robbe a kiss and caresses his hair.

'It was nice. We went to the skate park. It stopped raining so it was nice to be outside.'

'Please, don't make me jealous, I've been inside all day,' Sander says with a sigh.

'You haven't been outside for not even a minute?' Robbe asks surprised.

'No, not even a minute,' Sander replies.

'That's not healthy, you need some fresh air every now and then.'

'I know. I will make a short walk everyday from now on,' Sander answers.

'You're such a good boy. Have you taken all your pills for today?' Robbe asks.

Sander is a bit annoyed but he knows Robbe only has good intentions. 'So far, yes. I will take the last ones now.'

Robbe stands up and puts his arms around his boyfriend. He looks him in the eyes and gives him a kiss. 'Tomorrow evening you can relax, it's Christmas Eve.'

'A pity that we won't spend Christmas Eve together,' Sander replies with a sad voice.

'I know,' Robbe answers. 'But we both have to see our family. Next year we certainly will be together.' They kiss each other again.

'So you're spending Christmas Eve with your father's brother?'

Robbe goes on with peeling the potatoes. It doesn't go very quick, but he's quicker than a few weeks ago. 'Yes, he asked me to come and I owe him something. I left him alone at the restaurant that Friday when you told me there is nothing between us.'

'Let's not think about that anymore,' Sander says quickly.

Robbe goes on without mentioning the restaurant again. 'And I don't want to be alone here, not at Christmas Eve. Milan is with family in The Netherlands and Zoë will be with family too.'

'We will be together at Christmas,' Sander says, trying to calm down Robbe.

'I'm very curious how they will both react. They know about you, but they haven't seen you yet and my mother is better but maybe not yet 100%. We have to be careful with her.'

'Minute per minute,' Sander smiles. 'With me and with her. It will be okay if we do it like that.'

Robbe smiles too. 'I hope the atmosphere will not be too tense. My father and mother haven't always had the best relationship.'

'It's Christmas,' Sander says. 'They won't argue on a day like that. At what time you have to pick up your mother Wednesday?'

'At noon,' Robbe answers. 'My father expects us at 11.30 and then he drives us to the institution. We will check her out and take her home with us. That will be the first time in months I'm together with my mother and my father at the same time.'

'Everything will be alright.' If Robbe isn't the one calming Sander down it's the other way around. They both make each other calm when it's necessary. 'Will you ask your father if you can live back home with him and your mother?' Sander asks.

'I'm their only child, so I don't think I have to ask. They'd love to have me back home, certainly now my mother will be back. I also can't expect my father to take care of her on his own.'

'You're such a good boy,' Sander smiles.

Robbe is washing the peeled potatoes now and will then cook them as Zoë learned him. She told him she would be back by 8.

'So Lisa is coming back next week?' Sander asks.

'Yes. At least, I think so. I don't know the exact date. At the end of December but it can be she still spends New Year's Eve abroad. It will hurt when I have to leave here.'

Sander says nothing for a moment, he's thinking. Just thinking, about everything and nothing. Overthinking things.

'So your mother and father aren't together anymore?' Robbe asks Sander.

Sander is a bit annoyed, but he knows he has to tell Robbe anyway one day. He has to be honest with Robbe.

'My father hasn't always been there for me and my sister,' Sander explains. 'He hasn't always been the best father. He rather went outside drinking and when he came back he hit my mother. They divorced 5 years ago, when my mother finally found the courage to leave him.'

'That's heavy,' Robbe replies.

Sander answers: 'Let's not think about it anymore. If I think about it I get sad and angry at the same time. I don't want to risk to get a depressive episode.'

'It's alright,' Robbe says. He hugs Sander, while the potatoes are cooking.


	5. 24/12, 17:26

Messenger chat between Robbe and Sander

Sander: "A pity that we're not together this evening"

Robbe: "Tomorrow we celebrate Christmas together. I'm looking forward to it!"

Sander: "I love you"

Robbe: "I love you too!"


	6. 25/12, 18:32

'I think it's time for the presents now, isn't it?' Robbe's father says.

'Presents?' Robbe reacts surprised.

'Robbe, don't say you didn't buy presents for your parents,' Sander says.

Robbe smiles. 'Of course I bought something. I thought about it quite late, but I found something.'

'Good, or you wouldn't get my present nor your parents present,' Sander replies.

'You have a present for me?' Robbe asks his father.

'Of course, we didn't forget you. It's not because it's been difficult the last few months that we don't want to give you something. You deserve it.'

Sander proudly looks at Robbe, while Robbe's father gives Robbe his present.

'It's quite heavy, quite big,' Robbe says.

'Come on, open it,' Sander says. 'I want to know what's inside.'

'You don't know?' Robbe asks. 'Are you sure?'

'Of course, how would I know. I haven't met your father or mother before, so it's not that I could have given them a hint.'

Robbe quickly opens the package. 'An Xbox, wow! Thank you. Really.' Robbe stands up, gives his father a hug and gives his mother a kiss.

'I also have something for you,' Sander says.

Robbe looks surprised again, he didn't expect all this gifts.

'You gave me a necklace, but you haven't got anything from me yet. As your father says, you deserve a present.' Sander smiles while saying this.

'This is way less heavy,' Robbe says when Sander gives him an envelope.

'But is it also cheap,' Sanders says playfully.

Robbe opens the envelope. 'A voucher.'

'Yes, but what kind of voucher. Read it,' Sander answers. Robbe's parents are watching Robbe and Sander proudly.

'A voucher for a night in a chalet. I think I still don't get it.'

'Are you serious, Robbe?' Sander is a bit disappointed. 'Read where it is.'

'At the coast. I think I get it now.'

'Finally,' Sander says. 'It's not just at the coast, it's where we officially first met.

'That's very sweet,' Robbe answers and he kisses Sander. 'But... Isn't that a bit strange? You slept there with Britt.'

'Maybe,' Sanders replies. 'But I wanted to go back to it. Tomorrow it's 2 months ago since we officially met. 26 October.'

'I remember it like it was yesterday.' Robbe smiles.

'Let's make it 100% our place,' Sander says convinced.

'How about your studies?' Robbe is worried, he want Sander to get good grades. He's a bit afraid that bad grades could cause a depressive episode with Sander.

'My what?'

'Sander, serious.'

'I took a day off tomorrow,' Sander answers. 'We have to spend enough time together. Not only being in the same room while I'm studying, but also spend time together. It's a bit busy now, first your exams, now mine, but I don't want to neglect you. I want to give you enough attention.'

'You really have a good boyfriend,' Robbe's mother says. 'I'm proud of you. I see how much you love each other.'

Robbe's father nods confirming.

'Someone who would like to have another drink?' Robbe's father asks.

'Yes, some kid's champagne for Robbe,' Sander says teasing.

'Excuse me?' Robbe answers in the same way. They both like to tease each other.

'You're still young, that's not good for your brain.'

'It isn't for you either. Bring here that bottle.'


	7. 26/12, 19:02

'Does your Instagram post already have likes?' Sander asks Robbe. They are walking along the beach, where they have spent the whole week with their friends. Unlike then it's raining now, but it's late December. It should be freezing.

'Of course, thousands. What else did you expect,' Robbe smiles. 'It seems people love gay love.'

Sander smiles too.

'Except...' Robbe goes on.

'Except what?' Sander asks.

'Except the people that beat us up that Friday evening.'

'We already discussed that,' Sander says annoyed.

'No, we didn't,' Robbe answers convinced. He's annoyed too now. 'Shit happens, you said, but that's not how I see it. Why didn't you want to go to the police?'

Sander sighs. 'I thought it was my fault.'

'Bullshit, Sander, it was not your fault.'

'I told you in school, where you found me that Monday before the Christmas holidays. I thought everything that I touched goes to pieces.'

'And you remember what I told you I hope.'

'Of course I remember,' Sander says. 'I will never forget. You're so sweet. Also I thought the police wouldn't believe us.'

'Sander, come on, there are camera's everywhere.'

'But aren't the files deleted yet?' Sander asks. 'It's five or six weeks ago.'

'Some keep the files up to two months. There is still time,' Robbe says. He really wants to stand with his point. If Sander doesn't agree Robbe will do it himself.

'Okay, I get your point. When we're back in Antwerp, tomorrow, we will go to the police. If that makes you feel better.'

'It does, yes. Thank you,' Robbe says in a soft way.

'Let's talk about a nicer subject now,' Sander says. 'We still have to eat something this evening. Let's go to that supermarket where we went that day. I want to do everything we did that day. So we go to that supermarkt now and we're going to make croques like I made them.'

'Okay,' Robbe says.

Robbe really is that person who never would make a quarrel. You have to push him very far before he gets angry. That's what Sander likes about him, but it also scares him. Robbe has to stand his ground when someone is pushing it too far.

'So what do we need to make croques like you make them?' Robbe smiles.

'Bread, tomato ketchup, butter... I'll show you in the supermarket.'

Sander kisses Robbe and lays his arm around his shoulder. In the other hand he still holds the umbrella to protect them from the rain.


	8. 26/12, 21:32

'There is something else we haven't done yet,' Sander tells Robbe mysteriously. Robbe is lying in Sanders arms, while he's playing with Robbe's hair.

'What then?' Robbe asks. 'I came in into the chalet, you made the same Booking.com joke, we went to the supermarket, we made croques...'

'I would like to take a shower if you know what I mean.' Sander says it with a straight face, looking Robbe in his eyes.

'Hoho, but that wasn't that day,' Robbe smiles. 'On the first day we met we didn't do that. That was on Sinterklaas.'

'I know,' Sander says. 'But I want it. I want you.'

'You are such a bad boy.' Robbe smiles again. 'Why can't I refuse you anything?'

'Because I'm hot,' Sander answers. 'Because I'm sexy.'

Now it's Robbe's turn to look at Sander with a straight face. 'If that wouldn't be true I would be laughing at you right now.'

'You aren't laughing,' Sander says proudly.

'Because I share your opinion,' Robbe answers teasingly. 'Man of my life.'

'Really? Am I?' Sander smiles. Knowing that someone loves him the way Robbe does fills his heart with joy.

Robbe gives Sander a kiss.

'Hoho, what are we doing?' Sander and Robbe love to tease each other.

'Giving you a kiss,' Robbe answers dryly. He tries to give Sander another kiss but Sander pulls his head away.

Sander stands up, takes off all his clothes and opens the shower. 'If you want another kiss you have to come here.'

Robbe doesn't react for a few seconds and just watches Sander taking a shower. All of a sudden he takes off all his clothes and almost runs to Sander. They look each other straight in the eyes for a few seconds.

'I love you,' Robbe says.

Sander doesn't say anything, he just gives Robbe one kiss. He knows Robbe loves to get one kiss and he loves seeing Robbe's face begging for more kisses.

He kisses Robbe again, continuously now, passionately. Sander has so much passion and love to give and Robbe is the one who deserves to get all of it.

'There is still a part left that we didn't do again,' Robbe says Sander. He opens his eyes and watches Sander straight in the eyes again.

'Then turn around,' Sander commands.

Robbe obeys. He loves the sweet, soft, artful Sander but he equally loves the playful, dirty, bad, even a bit dominant Sander.

Sander lays his left hand on Robbe's hair, with his other hand he takes Robbe's waist.

'Are you okay?' Sander asks.

'Of course I am. It's not the first time anymore,' Robbe answers.

Sander kisses Robbe. On his cheek, on his mouth. Robbe moans. Not only because he enjoys it, he also knows it turns on his man to see that he enjoys it.


	9. 27/12, 14:38

'Did you enjoy it at the coast?' Sander asks Robbe.

'Yes, it was a very nice surprise.' Robbe and Sander both smile. 'It really felt like the first day we met. Except for that late night part, that didn't happen back then.' They smile again.

Robbe and Sander are walking in the direction of the police station. Something Robbe wanted to do almost two months ago. The day after the assault happened.

Robbe and Sander are back from the coast since an hour. Also today they did everything like they did it the last day at the coast. Cleaning the chalet, bringing the glass to the container and almost having a kiss there. Of course they couldn't resist to do it for real now. They really kissed now after they started laughing because Sander acted like Luca when she disturbed them that week in October. 'Wow, that waste smells bad.' On their way back to Antwerp they quickly ate something. Pizza.

'So you're sure about the date?' Sander asks. 'Because I don't remember it very well, I think I suppressed it.'

'Yes, I'm sure about it. We had our first official date Friday after I went to your school to apologize for what I said. That day was the day after the Day of Armistice.' Robbe is convinced about his case, but he wants to have it done.'

They enter the police office in Antwerp Berchem, Robbe first, Sander second. A police officer greets them.

'Mister Driesen,' he says. 'And your name is?' he asks Robbe.

'Robbe. Robbe IJzermans,' Robbe answers politely.

'We would like to file a complaint,' Sander says. 'Against unknown.'

The officer watches them both. 'Okay, please follow me.'

The officer, quite tall, brings Robbe and Sander to a smaller room. It looks quite like an interrogation room like in a movie.

'My colleague will come right away. Have a seat,' the officer says and he leaves the room.

Sander feels the urge to ask Robbe if this really was a good idea but he leaves it like that. He knows it's important for Robbe.

A female police officer enters the room now. 'So you would like to open a police report?' she asks.

'Yes,' Robbe answers. 'For homophobia.'

'Sorry for my question but I have to ask it,' the police officer says. Veerle is her name, her name tag tells. 'How do you know it was homophobia?'

'They called us faggots, ass fuckers when they saw us kissing on the street. They ran after us and beat us,' Robbe explains. Sander lets Robbe tell everything, he doesn't want to say too much.

'My mother heart would say you have to be careful, but in fact they just have to let you live your life. What date was it?'

'15 November.' Robbe also gives the name of the bar they were having a drink that evening.

'Okay, that's not too long ago. We can still check the camera footage.'

'But the place they beat us up was in an alley next to the bar,' Robbe says.

'Yes,' Sander replies now, 'but they already got us at the corner of it. Maybe that was visible on the camera. They were pursuing us, that must be recorded by the camera certainly.'

'We'll definitely check it. Did you go to the doctor? It would be better if we have an official form about the wounds you got.'

'No, sorry,' Robbe answers.

'That's a pity, but I'm not going to ask why. You're not the first ones to come that late and certainly not the last ones. There are people who don't go the police or the doctor at all, so it's good that you came now.'

Robbe and Sander answer a few more questions of the police officer and complete all formalities.

'Let's talk about something else now,' Sander says when they are outside. 'Something nice.'

'Like what?' Robbe asks.

'What are we going to do on New Year's Eve?'

'I haven't thought about it yet,' Robbe says. It's cold outside, but it doesn't rain. Robbe shuts his jacket anyhow.

'I feel like going to a gay party,' Sander says. 'Maybe our friends want to join us. It would be a nice experience for them and for us it would be the first time too. You know what they say about gay parties. Better parties, better music, you can be yourself...'

'Are you serious?' Robbe asks surprised. He thinks for a few seconds. 'Okay, why not.'

'Red&Blue. Or Bonaparte, we'll see,' Sander says. He lays his arm around Robbe while they walk back to Casa Milan & Zoë, where Robbe still lives for a few more days.


	10. 29/12, 10:12

'What's wrong?' Robbe asks Sander when he comes into his bedroom. Sander slept at home last night, because Robbe went out last night with Jens. If Robbe comes home late he wakes up Sander and during the day Sander is more at ease at home sometimes. Zoë doesn't make that much noise, it's rather Milan with his one night stands. It's also, if Robbe and Sander are together they barely can leave each other for an hour. At least Sander. Although Robbe can be very clingy he can let Sander study when that's necessary.

'Can you hug me and hold me tight please?' Sander asks. He looks sad, afraid too, he looks like he didn't sleep that much.

'You're in a bad episode again?' Robbe never calls it a "depressive episode" or "manic episode". That's too heavy in his opinion. They both know enough when they look at each other.

'I'm never ever letting you go,' Robbe assures Sander. 'Didn't you take your pills yesterday?' Robbe doesn't like to ask that, he feels like an over-concerned mother when he does, but he has to ask it. He promised Sanders mother and sister to take very good care of him. He wants to take care of him. Although Sander is at home now his mother called Robbe and asked to come over. Robbe is the only person who can make Sander really feel at ease.

'Did you already take your medications for today?' Robbe asks.

Sander shakes his head from left to right. 'No,' he says.

'Okay, we're doing that now.' Robbe normally is a soft, sweet person, but when it comes to Sanders medications he has to be pushy sometimes. Not always, Sander doesn't want to feel treated like a child again. They've done it enough to him.

That's the hard part for Robbe about Sanders disease. When Sander seems to feel well everything is nice. Robbe has learned by now he has to pay attention when Sander seems to feel too well. But he still has to learn when he has to be pushy and when it's not necessary. He already annoyed Sander about that.

Sander takes his medications with a glass of water.

'Sorry but... Open your mouth please,' Robbe commands Sander. He has to make sure Sander swallowed all of them and doesn't keep them on his tongue to spit them out again when Robbe is not watching.

'Good. You're doing great,' Robbe says. He gives Sander a kiss and hugs him again for a few minutes.

'How was it with Jens yesterday evening?' Sander asks while they are in each other's arms.

'Very nice. But you know I always miss you when you're not with me.'

'That counts for me too,' Sander says with a little smile. 'Will Jens join us to that LGBT party in Bonaparte for New Year's Eve?'

'Shht, minute by minute,' Robbe hushes. 'But yes, he will join us. Just like Zoë, Milan and of course Zoë's friends. Jens will also ask Moyo and Aaron and Amber. They didn't know yet what they would do. They have to be at Ambers family for dinner first.'

'That's good to hear. It will be nice,' Sander says. 'Can you please stay here this afternoon?'

'Yes, I will stay,' Robbe assures Sander. 'I'm going nowhere. I let my parents know I won't make it to them this afternoon or that I might visit them this evening.'

'Thank you. I'll try to study a bit now,' Sander says while taking his school books. When Robbe watches Sander he only feels deep love.

Robbe grabs his phone to call his parents.


	11. 30/12, 11:57

'Have you read that news about two guys in Gent?' Robbe asks Sander. 'Two gay guys.'

Sander went along with Robbe yesterday evening to the apartment where he still lives with Zoë and Milan, now for three more days. January 2 Robbe is going back to his parents, Lisa is coming back that day. Robbe's rent was paid until December 31, but Zoë and Milan gave him 1 day for free. As a gift. He won't be there a lot on January 1 anyway, only to sleep a few hours before he and Sander will be visiting some family of them. Sander will stay with Robbe until January 1, in the evening he's going back to his mother.

'No, but I don't really follow the news,' Sander answers. He's sitting down at Robbe's desk, he was studying.

'Friday night, it was Saturday morning very early, about 5 am. They were beaten up by three men for being gay. Worst is, they were just friends!' Robbe is silent now, he thinks about that evening when he and Sander were beaten up.

'Did they go to the police?' Sander asks.

'Yes, they did. I hope they find the perpetrators soon.' Robbe looks really worried, almost sad. Sad that something like this still happens. 'Have you heard anything more about our case?'

'No, not yet,' Sander replies.

'I knew we had to go to the police right away! We waited for too long.'

'Robbe, calm down. There is still a chance they find the ones that did that to us. Maybe if they found the ones in Gent? They were three as well, you never know it are the same guys.' Sander tries to make Robbe feel more at ease. They both have to do that for each other sometimes.

'Do you think it's a good idea to go to that gay party tomorrow?' Robbe asks.

'Why not? We have to live our lifes, don't allow ourselves to be scared.' Sander has his arms wrapped around Robbe's waist. Robbe is standing up, looking Sander in the eyes all the time.

'Aren't you scared sometimes?'

'Sometimes, yes. If I think about it, if I think that it can happen again anywhere. That makes me sad. But tomorrow we are going out with a big group. I'm sure Moyo and Jens would fight for us if it's necessary. But it won't be necessary.' Sander tries to assure Robbe nothing bad will happen, although he never knows that for sure. He always wants to protect his boy, although he knows he can't protect him from everything.

'I love you,' Robbe says and he gives Sander a kiss.

'I love you too,' Sander replies. 'Go play a game on your new Xbox now so you can think about something else, I have to study now. Okay, cutie?'

'Okay. My artist,' Robbe answers with a smile.


	12. 31/12, 21:32

'So what do I do if a guy is interested in me?' Moyo asks. Everyone has arrived now. Milan and Zoë were already here of course, Sander and Robbe too. Jana and Luca have arrived at 21.00, Jens and Moyo arrived 15 minutes later, Aaron and Amber are still at the family dinner. They're not sure yet if they will make it, although there is still plenty of time. Before 5 in the morning no one of them will see their bed.

'Then you flirt back,' Milan jokes.

'Dude, I'm not going to flirt with another guy,' Moyo replies.

'In life you have to try everything. Maybe you'll like it,' Sanders turn to make a joke now.

'No, thank you,' Moyo says with a forced smile. 'Don't make me regret I join you all to go to a gay party. I only go there for the good music.'

'It's okay, Moyo, we know,' Milan says.

'Just tell him you're not interested,' Robbe says.

'But don't tell him you're straight. That turns on some guys,' Milan says. Everyone starts laughing.

'Maybe you can find yourself a boyfriend over there,' Jana says to Luca.

'At a gay party?' Luca replies. 'I don't think that will happen.'

'There won't be only gay guys,' Milan says. 'There will be bisexual guys too, pansexual and maybe some straight guys too. Like Moyo and Jens.'

'So there might be some bisexual, pansexual or straight girls for us too?' Moyo asks.

'Yeah, of course. Women love gay guys and gay parties. They are more at ease than they are at straight parties, to call it like that. There always are straight guys who think they can seduce them or just try to get them in their bed.'

'Okay, I'm starting to feel like going to that party tonight,' Moyo smiles.

'Milan, you didn't have tighter pants and a tighter shirt?' Zoë asks.

'It's the tightest I have,' Milan replies. The others are following the conversation concentrated.

'I see. Sorry, it's already obvious that you're gay but like that you look very, very gay.'

'I know,' he answers Zoë. 'That's why I'm wearing this,' he laughs. 'I feel like going all out tonight. It's only one time a year New Year's Eve.'

The other boys are all nicely dressed for this evening. Sander is wearing the same style as usual, with his Dr. Martens shoes, jeans trousers, a David Bowie T-shirt and a shirt above it.

Robbe is wearing a more classical trousers with a nice T-shirt and a new sweater he bought today. He wanted to wear a bow tie but it's only a party in a bar and he and Sander wanted to fit together. It wouldn't match if one is dressed like he's going to a prom and the other one like he's going to a random party. That's why Jens is wearing the bow tie now.

The girls are all wearing their nicest dress.

'Okay, someone who would like to have a drink? Cava for all of you?' Zoë asks.

'Cava?' Milan asks. 'I have something better.' Milan goes to the kitchen and brings along three bottles. 'Champagne! As I said, it's only one time a year New Year's Eve. A glass of champagne for everyone?'

'Not for me,' Zoë says.

'Really?' Milan asks.

'Okay, one glass. But then it's over. Someone has to watch over the drunk people.'

'We won't get drunk,' Robbe says. He's talking about Sander and him. Sander can't drink too much anyway. 'I like to remember what I'm doing.'

'Okay, one glass only for you and one for Sander too,' Milan concludes.

'How was y'all's family dinner?' Jana asks.

'Very good,' everyone answers.

'But I'm glad I'm here now,' Moyo says. 'Family dinner is always a bit awkward.'

'Sander and I stayed here,' Robbe says. 'We celebrated on our own.'

'How cute,' Jana says.

'You couldn't celebrate with family?' Luca asks.

'No, not this year,' Robbe answers. 'Both my parents and Sanders mother invited us, but we didn't want to choose.'

'And everyone together?'

'That's too early, my mother left the institution only 1 week ago.'

'Who cooked?' now Jana asks again.

'Robbe cooked,' Sander says. He smiles. 'If I would had to cook it would have been a bit of everything.'

'But you had to study,' Robbe says to Sander. He gives him a kiss.

'It wouldn't be something for me neither. I can't even bake an egg. Or maybe I can just that,' Moyo says.

'What did you cook?' Zoë asks. 'I saw some ingredients before I left but I have no idea what you made with it.'

'First we ate some snacks,' Robbe explains, 'soup and something with shrimps, as main course we ate smoked salmon with broccoli from the oven and as a dessert we had ...'

'Each other?' Luca asks. 'Sorry, bad joke.'

'Also,' Sander smiles. 'But first we ate chocolate mousse. It was all very tasty.'

'Robbe and the chocolate mousse you mean?' Jens asks.

'I was talking about the food,' Sander answers. 'You've done a great job, cutie,' Sanders says to Robbe and he kisses him. 'I will return the favor one day. Or reward you.'

'Okay, boys,' Zoë says. 'If you need a room, now is the moment before we go to that party.'

'We are okay,' Robbe laughs.

'Are you sure?' Sander asks. 'I wouldn't say no.'

'Sander, behave yourself. It's only 1 hour ago,' Robbe says. He's a bit embarrassed before his friends but he loves the way Sander talks about him. He gives him another kiss.

'Okay, that's too much information guys,' Moyo says. 'I support you but that doesn't mean I want to know everything about your sex life.'

A phone is beeping, Zoë's phone. 'It's Amber,' she says. 'She and Aaron will come to Bonaparte directly, they can't make it now.'

'When will they be there?' Jens asks.

'Shortly before midnight,' Zoë answers. 'So we're complete for now. Are we leaving to Bonaparte then?'


	13. 01/01, 01:12

'Hey Jens! How are you? Long time ago,' a guy says to Jens. It's quite crowded in Bonaparte, the party is on full speed now the new year has begun. Amber and Aaron were just on time for the countdown. They are dancing together a little bit further.

Jens smiles a bit nervously. 'I'm fine. Joining some friends here.'

'Someone you know?' Robbe asks.

'I don't really remember. I think we went to the same secondary school in the first year.'

'No wonder you don't remember, you're drunk,' Sander laughs.

'Not that drunk,' Jens answers. 'Where is Milan?'

Robbe points to Milan. 'Trying to find a boyfriend. He's kissing a guy but I don't know if that's the right way to find someone for a sincere relationship.'

'Did he know that guy?' Sander asks.

'Of course not,' Robbe answers. 'But he heard it's a group of Dutch people and he joined them. I think we lost him for the rest of the night.' Robbe takes another sip of his Coke, Sander is drinking the same. The others are drinking beer, the guys, the ladies are drinking wine. Except Luca, she's more a 'beer woman'.

Someone is approaching Robbe, he's neatly dressed. The guy is taller than Robbe, also taller than Sander. He's quite Robbe's type, despite his brown hair and brown eyes, but Robbe doesn't plan to have more than a talk with someone.

'Hello cutie, new here? It's the first time I see you here,' the guy asks.

Before Robbe can answer Sander does. 'Yes, it's the first time we come here. We're together for two weeks now and we wanted to come here to be more at ease.' After saying that Sander gives Robbe a kiss, straight on his mouth. The other guy walks away again.

'That's really cute,' Robbe says. 'You were jealous?' Robbe smiles.

'No one will ever touch my boyfriend,' Sander says. 'I don't have a problem with you talking with other guys, but it was obvious what he wanted.'

Sander and Robbe start kissing again, just like some other couples on the dance floor.

Moyo, dancing and watching around to meet nice girls, points at Jens when he sees him. 'What the fock is Jens doing over there?' Moyo almost screams. Jens is standing there kissing another guy. 'Is he bisexual?' Moyo asks confused.

'I don't know,' Robbe says. 'Jens is drunk.'

'Even if you're drunk I think you're at least a bit bisexual if you're kissing another guy,' Sander answers.

They are watching the whole scene for a few seconds, Robbe and Sander amused, Moyo confused.

'I saw that guy is part of that Dutch group Milan has joined,' Robbe says.

'This is becoming a bit awkward,' Moyo says. 'First you, now Jens. If Aaron wouldn't be with Amber I would start thinking he's gay or bisexual too.'

'Don't worry,' Robbe laughs. 'You're maybe the only straight guy in this place, but not the only one in the whole world.'

Jens apparently has seen his friends are watching him. He grabs the other guy's shoulder and takes him along with him.

'Hello guys,' Jens says. 'May I introduce you to Lucas. What's your surname?' Jens still has his arm around the guy's shoulder.

'Van der Heijden,' Lucas answers.

'Lucas van der Heijden,' Jens repeats.


	14. 02/01, 14:25

'So what was it with that Lucas guy on New Year's Eve?' Robbe asks Jens. They both are at the skate park, still having holiday for a few more days.

'That kiss you mean?' Jens asks.

'That kiss, yes,' Robbe smiles. 'You still remember it.'

'Yes, as I told you, I wasn't that drunk.'

'Then why did you kiss him?' Robbe asks. He's very curious. Would his best friend also have a different sexual orientation? It would be cool watching guys together.

'No, I'm still straight,' Jens explains. 'I just wanted to know how it is to kiss a guy and at that party I saw my chance. He looked cute.'

'You're sure?' Robbe asks. 'Don't push away who you are if that's who you are. I tried to do it and that was a very bad idea.'

'If I ever fall in love with another guy you will be the first to know,' Jens says. 'Besides that, I couldn't ask you to kiss me, you're with Sander.'

'You should've asked me last year!' Robbe laughs. 'Before I knew Sander.'

'Maybe I'm a little bit bisexual, though,' Jens goes on. 'I don't know if you can say that if you kissed a guy just to try it. There are a lot of people I think who experiment.'

'That's true,' Robbe admits. 'Later some of them find out they indeed are bi or gay, but others marry someone of the opposite sex.'

There is a silence for a while.

'Hear me talking,' Robbe says. 'Like I'm an expert when it comes to gay relationships. I only know Sander since 2 months.'

'You never had someone before?' Jens asks.

'No, Sander really is the first one. Maybe I've been attracted to another guy but Sander is my first male love, the first one I kissed too. When I met him my whole world was turned upside down.'

'That's cute,' Jens says. It's actually the first time he and Robbe talk about Robbe's homosexuality, beside their talk when Robbe came out to Jens.

'But it also made things hard for me. I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't know what to do with these feelings. But anyway, I had to find out about it one day. If it was not 2 years ago or now it would have been in a couple of years.'

'How is Sander now?' Jens asks.

'He's okay, he's studying now. Last week he had a bad episode again but luckily that lasted for only 1 to 2 days.'

'What do you do then?'

'I try to make him feel more at ease first of all. Cuddle him. Assure him everything will okay. I stay with him all the time for that whole episode,' Robbe explains.

'What if that happens when you should go to school?'

'We'll see that when it happens. We take it minute by minute,' Robbe says. 'Probably I'd call a doctor to ask for a sick note for me. Come on, let's skate again, we'll be getting cold if we're standing still for too long.'

Robbe and Jens take their skateboard, Jens got a new one from his parents for his Christmas he said, with Sanders mural still in the background. They are the only ones here this afternoon, all space is for them.


	15. 02/01, 21:45

'Thank you for everything,' Robbe says to Zoë and Milan.

'It was a pleasure. Please visit again often,' Milan says.

'And don't forget to bring your lovely boyfriend with you,' Zoë answers now. She smiles, but she also has watery eyes.

Robbe smiles too. 'Come here,' he says. 'For a group hug.'

They hug each other for a few seconds, Sander already went home, he should be with his mother and his sister soon again.

'Okay, my father is waiting outside, I have to go. So that when Lisa arrives she can take back her room immediately. Thank you again for the dinner tonight.'

'My pleasure,' Zoë answers. She cooked, with a little help of Milan. They made Robbe's favourite dish, scampi. Of course Milan had to let Zoë know a few times that his hands were dirty and that 'the fish stinks'. 'Scampi aren't fish,' Zoë then replied. 'It are crustacean.'

'I'll send you a message when I'm back home, normally in about 15 minutes. Don't panic when it's a bit later.' Robbe smiles again before he leaves the house.

Sander is standing in front of the door of his house. At least his mother's house, but officially he still lives there. He just spent a lot of time with Robbe in the last few weeks and a week in the institution.

He rings the door bell. He has a key, but he rings the bell to make his return official.

The light at the door goes on, Sander is feeling a bit nervous.

'Welcome home.' Sander immediately recognizes the voice and the person, although it's a few years ago. That person only gained some wait and looks a bit older. His father.

'What are you doing here?' Sander asks with quite some shock in his voice.

'Your mother and I are back together,' his father replies.

Sander rushes in and asks his mother for an explanation.

'We aren't really together again already, but I want to give it another chance. Your father has changed! It's 5 years ago. I never had someone after him and I found out I need a man in my life,' she says. Sanders sister Sarah is following the conversation without saying a word.

'But why him? You forgot that he beat you into the hospital a few times? That he threatened to throw me off the stairs? That he wanted to cut Sarahs hair when she was a young girl?' Sander asks. 'That he got me so traumatized that I developed bipolar disorder?'

'I understand you're angry,' Sanders mother says. 'But I really wanted to give your father another chance, certainly in this time of the year. I have two children with him, you and Sarah. He changed, he showed it.'

'How? How can you know that for sure?' Sander asks. He really gets angry now, he should need Robbe by his side to calm him down. He will certainly call him when this conversation is over.

'Your father and I are in touch again since a few weeks. Since the end of November. We didn't want to tell you yet because we had to find out things by ourself first,' Sanders mother tries to explain.

'A few weeks? Are your serious?' Sander almost screams now. 'I don't know if I can stay here,' he says with a slightly more silent voice.

'Please. Give it a chance. Give your father a chance,' Sanders mother begs.

Sander is thinking for a few seconds. About what to do, about what to say. 'I go to my room. What the fock.'


	16. 03/01, 11:32

Robbe's phone is ringing. Yesterday evening he and Sander agreed that Sander would call him. He hasn't heard Sander since then so far, till now.

'Hey, Sander, how are you? How is everything over there?' Robbe asks.

'Hi, Robbie,' Sander says. 'You look very good again,' Sander smiles.

'You too, as always. Sexy Sander. But Robbie?' Robbe asks confused.

'Yes, that's my pet name for you. Robbetje sounds weird, Robbie sounds cute,' Sander explains.

'What is that good for?'

'Don't you think it's nice?' Sander asks. 'We don't have a pet name for each other so far. We're still using each other's name, but we're a couple. We really should think about a pet name for each other. And not just honey, that's boring.'

'Okay, I will think about it,' Robbe says. 'But I think that will have to go automatically. One day I'll accidentally find one. But how is everything over there? How is your father?' Robbe is worried, because when Sander ignores a question mostly he doesn't feel good or he doesn't want to talk about it.

'My father is calm so far. He's behaving. But I don't trust him. One day he will explode again, I'm sure about that. Now I'm in my room all days, using my January exams as an excuse, saying I have to study. But I'm afraid for my mother and my sister.'

'Is there nothing you can do?' Robbe asks.

'No, it's my mother's house. She lets in whoever she wants.'

'You can come live with me if you want to,' Robbe says. 'I should ask my parents first but if I explain your situation they won't make a problem about it.'

'That's very kind, Robbie, very sweet, but I can't go away here. Certainly not now. I want to be here to protect my mother and my sister when it's necessary.'

'Can we see each other? Today or another day,' Robbe asks.

'I'm afraid not,' Sander answers. 'My father doesn't know about us yet and I'm sure he would make a problem about it. He's very conservative and I want to avoid problems during my exams.'

'Okay, I understand. But if you need me, just ask me.'

'I will do,' Sander says. 'We can call or video call, like now, and send text messages but we can't see each other for a few days. I will let you know when it's possible again.'

'Okay,' Robbe says, sounding very sad.

'Don't be sad, we'll be together again soon enough. Before you know it you're in my arms again.'

Robbe smiles a bit. 'I love you,' he says.

'I love you too,' Sander replies. 'Forever. I have to go now.' Sander ends the video call.


	17. 03/01, 21:33

Messenger chat between Robbe and Sander

Robbe: "Is everything okay over there?"

Sander: "Yes, so far it is. My father went to a café but he came home sober."

Robbe: "Pfhew, that's a small relieve. It's a start, hopefully it stays like that."

Sander: "We have to see about that. How is it over there?"

Robbe: "I'm out with Jens, Aaron and Moyo. We needed it, right before school starts again."

Sander: "Have fun. Give them my regards and tell them I hope to join you again soon."

Robbe: "Will do. Love you."


	18. 05/01, 17:23

Robbe tries to videocall Sander again. He picks up now.

'Why didn't you pick up your phone an hour ago?' Robbe asks. He's already worried when he doesn't hear his boyfriend for 5 minutes.

'Sorry, Robbie, I didn't have my phone with me. Also I'm studying during the day, so I can't touch my phone too much. You understand, Robbie?' Sander explains.

'Yes, sorry. You know how quickly worried I am,' Robbe answers.

'Have you already come up with a pet name for me?' Sander asks playfully.

'Not yet.' Robbe smiles. 'I told you that has to come spontaneous.'

'Okay, I see. So for now you're still calling me just Sander?' Sander shows a pout.

'Sexy Sander,' Robbe answers.

They both smile now.

'How is your father?' Robbe asks.

'Still okay. I have come out of my room once, today.'

'That's good,' Robbe answers. 'So you start to trust him?'

'That are big words,' Sander says. 'I don't know if I can ever trust him again. I won't forget what he has done. If I learn to tolerate him I think I've done a good job.'

'That would be a great job,' Robbe says. 'I know you're not a harmful person.'

Sander says nothing for a few seconds. Robbe knows what these words mean to him, how good they make them feel.

'Something else now,' Sander says. 'It's been a few weeks since I talked about it, but you still have to take your Bowie examination.'

'I already forgot about it,' Robbe says. Back then he thought Sander was joking, now he knows if Sander jokingly says something he might mean it.

'You haven't studied yet?' Sander asks with a bit of disappointment in his voice.

'No, not yet.' He looks a bit embarrassed. 'Well, I have listened to your playlist, but not really studied it.'

'You get one week to study. Let's say I will test you Friday evening.' Sander isn't sure how things will evolve at his home, but he wants to give Robbe something to look forward to. He knows how much Robbe wants to see him and the feeling is mutual. If Sander has something to look forward to he can cope better with difficult situations.

'What if I fail?' Robbe asks.

'A bit more selfconfidence, Robbe,' Sander replies. 'But if you really fail you will have to study again.'

'What if I succeed?'

'Then you go on to the next level. Then you'll get another week to study for the advanced Bowie exam. You know this one is only for beginners.'

The way Sander talks about something so passionately really makes Robbe feel fall in love over and over again. 'What exactly do I have to study?' Robbe asks.

'Simple. I will let you hear a part of a Bowie song, you have to tell me which song it is, in what year the song was released and which album the song is on,' Sander explains.

'Euh... Simple you say?'

'Come on, Robbie, there are only 30 songs in that playlist. Bowie has 152 songs. Next time there will be 60 songs in the playlist.'

'Okay, I better start studying then,' Robbe laughs.

'Yes, you should,' Sander smiles. 'It will motivate me to study knowing that my boyfriend is studying too.' 

Robbe and Sander then just sit there for a few minutes, watching each other through the screen. 

'Oh,' Sander says, 'I will tell my father about us this evening.'

Robbe is filled with joy but is also worried. 'Are you sure that is a good idea?' he asks. 

'I don't want to hide you any longer,' Sander answers. 'If he doesn't accept it it's his problem.'

'Okay, let me know how he reacted,' Robbe says.

They end their video call with the usual "I love you's" and go both studying.


	19. 05/01, 21:26

'I should tell you something,' Sander says to the man who is his father. He doesn't call him 'father' or 'dad'. That would make him feel like they have a bond but they have not. They used to have, when Sander was still young, a child. That bond is broken now, since Sanders father assaults on his wife and children a few years ago. Even using his father's name would make Sander feel weird, for the same reason.

'Okay, I'm listening,' Sanders father says.

'I got to meet someone.' Sander is quite nervous, although he doesn't really care about what his father thinks. He only hopes he doesn't go crazy.

'Really?' Sanders father says before Sander can say something more. 'I'm so proud of you, my son!'

Sander gathers his courage. 'His name is Robbe.'

It's silent now, for a few seconds. Sanders mother and Sanders sister don't say anything, they probably don't dare to. Also Sanders father is silent.

'Robbe? So your partner is a guy? How old are you? 19?'

Sander confirms.

'You're still young, you can't know that yet. Just wait a bit before you tell someone,' Sanders father goes on. 'When you will meet the right girl everything will be okay. Just don't tell someone yet. If you later find out that you're not like that you have told everyone, but no girl still wants you.'

Sander waits a few seconds before he answers. He wore a T-shirt of Robbe to give him strenght, courage. 'Everyone already knows.'

'Everyone?' His father just sits there staring, not saying anything. Sander is getting afraid for what will happen next. When his father is out of sight he will call or text Robbe. He needs his support. If he doesn't do that he risks of getting in another bad episode. Although he took all his medicines in the last few days, so maybe it doesn't go that way.

'I need some time for myself,' Sanders father reacts now. He stands up, takes his jacket and goes outside.

'He will be okay with it soon enough,' Sanders mother says.

'I hope so,' Sanders sister react. 'I'm still not sure if it was a good idea to take him inside again.' She's obviously afraid too.

'My father knows about us,' Sander sends to Robbe when he's sure his father left the house. Robbe is typing but Sander is quicker. He knows what Robbe would ask. 'He said I can't know it yet, about me loving boys.'

'That's bullshit,' Robbe replies. 'I will come over.'

'No, no, please not,' Sander says. 'I mean it this time, stay away from here. I will let you know when you can come back, when we can see each other again. My father went outside, to his favourite pub probably, but we don't know when he will come back. If he will come back.'

'Keep me posted,' Robbe says. That's it. No 'I love you' this time, that's not really the right moment. They're both too nervous.


	20. 06/01, 04:25

'Have you really been out almost all night?' Sanders mother yells. 'You're drunk, I see it and I smell it. Seven hours you've been gone!'

Sander wakes up from the noise. He goes to take a look in the corridor and hopes his sister stays inside her room. Sanders parents are standing on top of the stairs. His father probably just came up, his mother heard him coming home and was waiting for him.

'I'm not that drunk. Thereby, what's the problem that I had some fun?' he asks, quite offensively.

'You never changed, I shouldn't have believed you that fast. But we'll talk about it, for tonight you can go sleeping on the couch.' Sanders mother is standing firmly blocking her bedroom door with her body.

All of a sudden his father sees Sander standing at his door. 'There he is, the one I used to love. Have you thought about it? Have you thought about dating another girl first?'

'Stop with that,' Sanders mother yells. 'Sander can date anyone he wants to, I don't have a problem with that. But you seem to have.'

Sander is starting to get afraid for his mother, for what could happen to her if his father doesn't control himself.

'My son would never fall in love with another man,' he says looking at Sander. 'You can't be my son. You are not my son.'

Sander can't control himself anymore now. 'Fine, because you're not my father either. A father should be there for his children. Not threaten them, not belittle them, not beat his wife. You've never been there for us.'

'Do you really just said I have hit my wife in the past? Or threatened or belittled you or your sister?' Sanders father is looking very angry now. He puts a step in the direction of Sander.

'That's what I said, yes,' Sander confirms, without showing any fear. From the corner of his eye he sees his sister has opened her bedroom door a little bit, she's watching through the chink.

'Enough now,' Sanders mother yells. 'Get out of my house! Now! I never want to see you again.' She's standing there in her pajamas that were a gift from Sander and his sister.

'So you're telling me you don't allow me to see my daughter ever again?' He turns back to Sanders mother.

'Yes and I can assure you I will get it made officially! Tomorrow, first thing I will do,' she answers threatening.

All of a sudden Sanders father pulls out a sharp knife. He's pointing it in the direction of Sanders mother, making clear he wants to stab her. He lashes out at her with the knife.

'No!' Sander shouts. He jumps forward and pushes his father to make him get away from his mother.

His father screams. He falls off the stairs, with his head downwards first. He doesn't react anymore, all Sander sees is a bit of blood coming out of his ear.

Everyone is surprised, shocked. Sanders sister has opened her bedroom door completely now.

'Call an ambulance!' Sanders mother yells while she's quickly descending the stairway.


	21. 06/01, 07:25

Robbe's phone is ringing. As always when his phone is ringing or his alarm sounds off he's awake immediately. It's Sander.

'Sander?' Robbe asks confused. He's worried, Sander usually doesn't call him that early.

'Didn't I wake you up?' Sander asks.

'I had to wake up anyway to be at school on time. You're not videocalling me like usual?'

'Yeah, I almost forgot the holiday is over. I'm at the police,' Sander says.

If Robbe wasn't completely awake yet he sure is now. 'What?! What happened? For our case?'

'No, my father is dead,' Sander says.

Robbe is even more confused now than he already was. 'Euh... What happened?' If Robbe wasn't already worried enough he really is now.

'My father came home drunk and threatened my mother with a knife. He wanted to stab her and I pushed him to get him away from her,' Sander explains. 'He fell off the stairs. It was an accident.'

'Do the police believe that too?' Robbe asks, hoping Sander will say yes.

'Yeah, they already said so. Only my father' s finger prints were found on the knife. They examined all of us, my mother, my sister and me, and of course we all told the same.'

'That's good. So you will be at home again soon?' Robbe asks. 

'Yes, soon enough. A judge will decide about it today but the police say it will be alright.'

'I will be at ease when you're really back at home, when they dropped the case,' Robbe says. 'When I see you and can hold you in my arms.'

'Tonight or tomorrow we'll be together again,' Sander says.

'How about your exams?' Robbe asks. 

'I have my first one tomorrow, luckily. But I have to go now. Good luck at school. Love you.'

'Love you too,' Robbe answers. He makes a kissing sound as if he gives Sander a kiss.


	22. 07/01, 17:32

'I got a phone call from the police,' Sander says to Robbe. They are finally back together, at Robbe's place now, after being separated for 5 days. They both can't miss each other for that long anymore. 1 day is okay, but 2? They already start freaking out if they don't see each other for 2 days.

'What did they say?' Robbe asks.

'My mother, my sister and I are not guilty for the dead of my father, the judge decided that.'

'That's very good news! What a relieve.' Robbe smiles a big smile and kisses Sander.

'There is more,' Sander goes on. 'The police found our perpetrators.'

'Really?' Robbe reacts surprised. 'That's also good news I guess. So can still bring them to court?'

'Yes,' Sander says. 'The only thing we have to do, is testify officially after we get a letter from the court.'

Robbe hesitates for a few seconds. 'Okay, if we have to we will do it. It won't be nice, it won't be easy, but I wanted to see them being punished.'

'They also told me it would be better if friends want to witness too. Milan and Zoë. They have seen your wounds and bruises. Because we haven't gone to the doctor.'

Sander looks Robbe in the eyes, waiting for what he will say. Robbe could blame him, saying something like 'Yes, we haven't done that because you didn't want to.' But Robbe is not like that.

'Okay, I'll ask them,' Robbe answers. 'They will certainly be willing to do that.'

Sander gives Robbe a kiss and as usual Robbe keeps his eyes closed for a few seconds after that. 'Don't forget to study for your Bowie exam,' Sander says.

'I began studying yesterday.'

'That's very good,' Sander replies. He smiles, gives Robbe a kiss and stands up.

'Are you really leaving me here like this?' Robbe asks.

'How do you mean, like this?' Sander asks now.

'You're teasing me and then you're gone. That's not the first time!' Robbe is lying on his bed now.

'I have to study, sorry Robbie,' Sander answers.

'What's your next exam?'

'Art history.'

'Okay, I'm art history,' Robbe says.

Sander laughs. 'You hungry boy.'

'That's your fault. You are just too sexy,' Robbe answers. 'Sexy Sander.'

They both smile and laugh. Sander can't control himself anymore now. He kisses his boy passionately, Robbe already got his eyes closed right before that. He loves Sanders kisses so much. Sander almost eats him when he kisses him. He really got Robbe pushed against the mattress now.

'I love you,' Sander says. He takes off Robbe's shirt and quickly takes off his own. He lies on Robbe now and he really loves the feeling of their naked bodies touching each other.

Also the trousers go off now. Sander is discovering Robbe's whole body with his hands. In a short time they have got to know each other quite well. They both know of each other what the other one likes.

Robbe shrieks. 'Not my back please! Stay away from my back. I'm sensitive there.'

Sander laughs. 'Good to know,' he says and he touches Robbe's lower back again.

'Sander, come on,' Robbe says. Sander laughs again.

'Sorry,' Sander says and he goes on with kissing Robbe. Robbe pushes Sander down now and goes sitting on top of him.

'Ho, what are we doing?' Sander asks teasing.

'Nothing,' Robbe smiles. 'Just let me do, okay?'

'Okay,' Sander answers. He keeps his hands under his head and relaxes.


	23. 10/01, 19:55 - the Bowie exam

'Are you ready for the Bowie exam for beginners?' Sander asks Robbe. He smiles.

'Yes, I've been studying until this morning,' Robbe answers seriously.

'You still paid attention to your school work I hope?'

'Of course. But I really want to pass this exam so I can go on to the next level.' Robbe is still very serious, he really seems to mean it. He's not a very good actor, so if he would only play showing interest in the exam Sander would immediately see it.

'Okay, first one then.' Sander puts the CD in the CD player and pushes play. Usually he streams music but as one of the biggest David Bowie-fans he had to had all his CDs.

I... I will be king... And you... You will be queen... it sounds through the boxes.

'That's an easy one,' Robbe says almost immediately. 'Heroes.'

'Yes, very good,' Sander says. He's standing in front of Robbe, Robbe is having a seat on Sanders bed. Like it's the case in class rooms, except that the bed is a school desk. 'But what year is it from and which album is it on?'

'Fock,' Robbe replies. First question and he already has to think quite hard. 'The album is also called Heroes, I know that. It must be a song from the 80's. No, it's a border one, I think I remember now. 1977!'

'Very good!' Sander is surprised, his boy really studied for this fake exam. Robbe has that cute, big smile on his face, he's proud he knew the answer.

'So, what's my reward now?' he asks.

'Your reward? This was only the first question. You get a reward when you passed the exam.'

Before Robbe can say anything Sander makes the second song start playing.

Didn't know what time it was and the lights were low  
I leaned back on my radio

'This is a more difficult one,' Robbe says. He listens to the song for a while before he answers.

'If you don't know it before the chorus starts playing you don't have this one,' Sander goes on. 'The song title is in the chorus so that would be too easy.' He watches his boyfriend thinking. Whatever Robbe does, he always looks cute. Damn, I'm such a lucky man with Robbe. How did I even deserve him.

Robbe sings on the lyrics and all of a sudden he answers. 'Starman, 1973.'

'Starman is good. I should give only 1 point for that answer because the chorus was about to start, but the year is wrong. It's 1972. So I just give you 1 point here instead of 2.

'Come on, you're such a strict teacher,' Robbe says. Sander has to swallow hearing Robbe calling him 'teacher'. Why is his boyfriend such a tease. He doesn't even have to open his mouth and he already turns on Sander.

'Which album is it on?' Sander asks now.

'Ziggy Stardust. Actually The rise and fall of Ziggy Stardust and the spiders from Mars.'

'Very good!' Sander says proudly. 'Third one now.'

'That's an easy one,' Robbe says. The intro has just started and he already knows the answer. 'One of my favourite songs. Where are we now, The Next Day, 2003.'

'3 out of 3!' Sander says loudly. 'The day before yesterday this song was 7 years old, released on his birth day. Today is his date of death but I guess you found out during studying.'

Robbe nods.

'8 out of 10! That's very good,' Sander says after the last question of the exam. At first he wanted to make it 15 or even 20 questions but that would maybe have taken too long. It's already a surprise they haven't kissed each other during these 10 questions.

'So what is my reward now?' Robbe asks curiously.

'Your reward?'

'Come on, Sander, don't tell me there's no reward. Don't tell me I've studied for nothing,' Robbe says.

'You definitely didn't study for nothing!' Sander replies, a bit annoyed. 'You've learned some very important culture! But your reward, okay. Close your eyes. If I see you're watching you don't get a reward at all.'

Sander really had to think about a good reward. He could offer himself but that would be too easy. Too obvious.

'It's something I always got from my mother when I had good exams,' Sander explains. 'Another family tradition. Open your eyes.'

'A cake, wow, tasty,' Robbe says sincerely. 'You made it?'

Sander nods.

'Would I trust that?' Robbe laughs.

'It's a recipe of my mother so yes, you can trust it,' Sander laughs too.

'You're too good for me,' Robbe says. He stands up and gives Sander a kiss, Sander with the cake still in his hands.

'You're too good for me,' Sander replies. He puts the cake on his desk, pushes Robbe on his bed and takes off his shirt.

'And now the real reward,' Sander says, watching Robbe straight in the eyes.


End file.
